The waves of uncertainty

I am rattled.

My soul is in turmoil.

I am tired, my head is pounding and my heart feels stripped.

A few weeks ago, we had an appointment with the education minister who told us that the homeschooling law will be out by December and that in January we’d be able to homeschool.  I was elated!  Only 1 semester of torture and we can enjoy our lives. One semester is doable!

I haven’t told my son whose been asking to homeschool him since he actually was in kindergarten.  I have been afraid he’d end up disappointed if the law will be delayed.

And that is my problem right there!  They were meant to issue a consultation paper but to date nothing’s come out.  In 2 weeks or so parliament will be on holidays and if that paper is not out I doubt the law will make it by December.

That is not good at all.  I cannot afford another year of misery.  I do not want to hear I had a bad day or I am unhappy or some such anymore on a daily basis.  I do not want all the progress we did and will do till end of summer to become unravelled again.  I am unwilling to accept the status quo.

But I am alone here! My immediate family is not on board here and if push leads to shove I will be in battle on all fronts and at just that thought I feel extremely tired and lonely and sad….

My heart breaks.  I am looking at the loopholes of the law so that I can have them allow me to keep him home.  I know I can get him evaluated or something and a tutor comes to teach them although how that system works I got no idea and frankly I am quite happy to teach him my way since I know it works.  And while I am doing this and thinking of this, I know that unless something changes I am in for a long drawn battle which I am happy to avoid.

All I want is my son to enjoy learning.  To do so in his environment at his own terms as much as possible.  I cannot understand why people find it so difficult to understand this.  I cannot understand why they keep on about the socialisation debate which frankly is non-existent anyway since school is not a place to socialise.

In the meantime I will breathe and meditate and think and trust an answer is there waiting for me to discover it!


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